Saturday, November 14, 2009

Shakes It Up.

In my literature class, we just finished reading Othello. Was it good, you ask?

The short answer: Yes.

The long answer: Yesssssssssssssss.

Being Shakespeare, naturally he gave me some sort of inspiration. Like reconstructing my speech into thees, thous, and thines. Or better yet, reconstructing insults and threats into Puritan-esque phrases (something which everyone, at some point in their lives, should try).

Here's just a few...

Witty Quips of Genius and the Like (Or What You Will)

Modern:  Shutup!
Shakespearean:  Hold fast your vile tongue!

Modern:  Get lost!
Shakespearean:  Disposess your person from mine presence!

Modern:  I will cut you.
Shakespearean:  I shalt transfix my blade into your skin. (O happy dagger!)

Modern:  In your face!
Shakespearean:  Within the proximity of thine visage!

Modern:  You're an idiot.
Shakespearean:  Thou base fool, never before have I laid mine eyes on such knavery.

Modern:  Liar!
Shakespearean:  O villainy! Thy speech weighest falsehoods upon mine ears.

I would use these in everyday speech, but the vast majority of the poeple at my school would have absolutely no clue what I was talking about. Then again, that would be quite humorous...

Oh Shakes, you make everything more fun.

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